I do everything to the extreme. I struggle with all-or-nothing, black and white thinking. If it tastes good or makes me feel good I can't get enough of it. I don't just take up running... I run marathons. At times I can be extremely disciplined with my nutrition... At other times, I can't have one cookie without the flood gates opening. Next thing you know I'm eating like I just got out of prison. If I find a piece of clothing that I like, I need to have it in every color. When I come up with a new idea or venture, it can quickly become an obsession that occupies my thoughts at every waking moment.
I am a perfectionist, a go-getter. In many areas of my life, these traits have served me well. As an entrepreneur, I have created and grown multiple small businesses from nothing. I have trained for and completed three marathons. Twenty years ago, with discipline and hard work, I achieved a level of fitness that enabled me to win the title of NABBA Ms. Figure USA (2004). As a Fitness and Nutrition Coach, I am able to use my knowledge, experience and passion to enable happier, healthier and fuller lives and to inspire and empower people to take charge of their health and fitness to become the best possible version of themselves.
But with perfectionism comes fear. Fear of never being good enough; of not achieving a goal. I can become so preoccupied with a thing that I fail to stop and smell the roses. I can become so obsessed with my plans that I miss opportunities for growth that have been placed before me. I can be so focused on "doing" that I forget to just "be."
So the one thing I continue to strive for is BALANCE. The only way I know to do that is to take it one day at a time and to be fully present in the moment. When I am consumed with feelings of anger, resentment, worry, jealousy, envy - anything other than love - then I am in fear. When I'm in fear then I know I'm in the past or the future. I am not present. Because right now, in this moment, I am being taken care of and all is well. In this moment, I have everything I need to meet the work that's ahead of me. Meditation, prayer, journaling, spending time in nature, "unplugging" for a little while each day... all of these things help me to stay present.
Today, I won’t let a minor setback stop me from trying again because I am a determined person who doesn't give up easily. I have a “fighting spirit." My effort and attitude determine my abilities and not the other way around. I like to try new things. I trust that failures are just opportunities for growth, self-development and learning something new.
Today, when I am afraid of something, I feel the fear and do it anyway. I challenge myself and know that fears and roadblocks are just part of the process. Experiencing fear and roadblocks ensures me that I have set a goal that's big enough to stretch me and grow me.
We've all heard the saying, "If you keep on doing what you've always done, you'll keep on getting what you've always got." I know that if I want something different I have to DO something different. I believe that to achieve a big goal I have to become a bigger person. I develop new skills, new attitudes and new capabilities. I stretch myself, and in so doing I will be stretched forever.
Growth takes time and it's not always linear. When life gets "lifey" things can get messy. I take one step forward and two steps back more often than I care to admit. But being present and taking it one day at a time makes life much more manageable and does wonders for my peace and serenity.