I went to the orthopedist today and he is not sure if it's a partially torn ACL. I left with a knee brace and some strengthening exercises to do at home. But he isn't prescribing an MRI yet. He said insurance typically won't approve it at this point. If it was completely torn, that would be a whole other story. I'm going back in 3 weeks and if it still isn't better, he'll prescribe one then.
The pain has lessened and I'm moving better today than I was even 2 days ago, so I'm grateful for that. Going up and down stairs is still a challenge - I have to take it one step at a time and can't put all my weight on my left leg...yet...at least not while it's bent.
The injury occurred last Thursday morning... and I spent a good 2 days feeling sorry for myself and then the next 2 days I spent comfort eating. It was a fantastic little pity party. But I don't feel guilt about it. In fact, two of my favorite moments from last week were 1) sitting on the grass, eating Wendy's with my nephew, and 2) enjoying a beautiful day outside, eating ice cream with my sister.
Using food as comfort, to feel good, and to stop feeling bad isn’t a problem on its own. Almost all of us do it sometimes. It’s normal and it makes sense.
The problem happens when:
We do it to excess.
We can’t or don’t stop when we’re satisfied.
We don’t have any other way of creating connection or comfort, or managing our feelings.
We feel out of control or compelled to do it.
Contrary to what some people may think, it is not always easy for me on the nutrition front. I struggle from time to time. Everyone struggles. It’s normal. I am human. I have learned to embrace that and cope with it... and I'm much happier for it.
Today, I don't have to roll around in guilt and remorse and berate myself for my "failure" for the next 7 days, or let it derail me from my long term plan. Today, I understand that it’s all part of the process. I can pause and ask myself, "How can I learn from this? What can I do differently next time?" I can accept that I got off course, learn from it, and move on.
I know there will be many other occasions when I will make extremely poor food choices and / or I will eat more than I should. I may relapse into old, familiar, ineffective and destructive habits that hinder my progress. The difference now is that it happens much less frequently. But when it does happen I am ready with a plan to help me recover quickly. I can use the skills and techniques I have learned - the very same skills and techniques I teach my Health Coaching clients - to minimize the damage, get control, and get back on track quickly.